When adjustments feel like a fight

Asking for adjustments shouldn't feel like asking for favours. But many neurodivergent employees describe being treated as difficult, demanding, or "not a team player" simply for requesting what they need to do their job.

Then there's the unintentional gaslighting. A neurodivergent employee arrives ten minutes late because of executive dysfunction, sensory overload, or transport anxiety. They stay ten minutes late to finish the work. A colleague notices the late arrival but not the extra time. The message: you're not trying hard enough. Meanwhile, the neurodivergent person is trying harder than anyone else in the building.

These small daily frictions build into something bigger. Mistrust. Exhaustion. Burnout. And eventually, talented people leave roles that could have worked if only the environment had been willing to flex.

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This isn't about blaming neurotypical colleagues.

Most workplace friction isn't malicious. It comes from a lack of understanding on both sides. Neurotypical staff don't always see the invisible effort behind masking. Neurodivergent staff don't always feel safe explaining it.

The solution isn't to pick a side. It's to build understanding together. When teams learn how each other's brains work, what drains them, what fuels them, what flexibility actually means, the dynamic shifts.

Both experiences matter. And when both are respected, everyone works better.

See our workplace training